I’ve done month-long silent meditation retreats before, but never in the wilderness. Most years over the past 7 years of doing nature retreats, we’ve spent a full month with the gear up, but I’ve been in and out, coordinating logistics and getting supplies for groups. This year (after our 5-day retreat), it’s just me and a few others in practice together for 30 days.
I feel the safest and most connected when I’m surrounded by nature. The presence of all the beings of nature fills in the cracks and edges of my soul, and I feel like I’m with deep family. Each being is transmitting an ancient wordless teaching that I have to listen closely to hear. But it’s not like being in a museum, observing from a distance, but like being a part of the dynamic co-origination of life. Tending to the site, filtering water from the river, harvesting wild plants, letting the bugs take a bite…I can feel the intimacy.
For the last almost 20 years, I’ve lived in rural areas, closer to nature. I’m just happier here. It’s like nature reflects back to me parts of myself that no other person could. I feel more complete, more whole. I know there are bears and cougars (and even rattlesnakes at this new site), but they’ve never really given me reason to worry. It’s the humans that have.
Everywhere I’ve lived, and most places I’ve run retreats, there’s always signs of significant impact. Waking up to the sounds of chainsaws and logging trucks has happened more times than I can count. Or just seeing the scars on the landscape, trying to imagine what each landscape looked like for thousands of years before the last 200.
For retreats, I look for land that has matured enough that it transmits wisdom. For the wet NW landscapes around me, that’s usually at least 80 years of relative peace. The forests become large enough, the understories complex enough, the intricate web of creatures harmonized enough that you can feel the teachings of interconnection crisp and clear. I like to think that everyone responds this way to some degree. The more ancient and intact the landscape, the deeper the teaching of silence, stillness, and spaciousness, as well as the interconnection and the impermanence.
I’ve always wanted to spend a month in the wilds without guiding or tending to a group. In fact, I have a little Starlink antenna so I can meet with my teachers during the experience. I’m sure it will be everything, the whole range of human experience, with edges and valleys, fears and joys. I look forward to sharing what I learn when I return.
🙏🙏🙏
- Justin Michelson